Defense with the BoomStick

The end of the world is something that may or may not happen, but if it does its good to be prepared. Defense with the BoomStick by Brandon Pilley (Omnicomic's resident zombie expert) will bring you a short tip to survive should the end of the world include zombies. And since we're dealing with zombies, please be aware that some tips may depict some rather gory scenarios. But last I checked zombies aren't looking to have a delightful cup of tea with you. Check. Check one, two one, two. This thing on? (Background crackling from the radio) maybe if I kick it...hey there we go. Alright everybody (and by everybody I mean you faithful and lucky people out there who are two things: one a survivor of this nightmarish place we call Earth and two a listener of my show), let’s get to it. Welcome back to the only radio broadcast still going strong and piping out the information that the government should have known or gave out before it got to be too late. It’s your old pal Brandon here to share some knowledge (and mostly to help my own sanity stay intact as well). Let’s start this one off with a bit of news that I picked up on the radios. Seems a lot of the islands in the world are faring a lot better then us mainlanders are in regards to keeping the infected out because of their isolated nature. Also more importantly to us stuck here in the good old U.S. of A it seems what’s left of the government is getting off its kicked butt and doing something to protect the people that’s left by setting up more outposts and safe zones. Most are in the east and far west coastal areas since the midwest is still rife with bandits and bad areas of infestations. Beyond this not much else to report about going on in the world or back here on the homefront except the usual stuff. If my memory serves me last week we went over handguns I believe and about the handiest one to have with you as you trek over the land (if not sorry my typist is out sick so I don’t have the transcript from last week to bad). Come on you know that was a good joke so laugh (but not to loud don’t want to let any zombies around to know where you are). So for this week I am gonna go over how to fortify a vacant home you might find in your travels or even the home you have lived in before all this broke out. So first off board up every single downstairs window and reinforce every door. You don’t want to board them up completely as you are cutting off a possible escape route if necessary. If it is a two story house move all of your equipment and supplies to the second floor and check to see if the water is still running in the house. If so, fill the bath tub and whatever other containers you can find with water so as to have the maximum amount of drinkable water on hand. Once on the second floor and everything on the first floor is secured and boarded up, with the tools you have destroy the stairs or if not possible nail large wooden boards to the stairs to make a ramp as zombies lack the motor skills to climb up the ramp. If the house you are occupying is only a single level house, move all your gear to the back of it closest to the back door (as that will be your way of escape). Never decide to get holed up in a basement of a house with no way out as that is a death sentence for you and whoever else is in your party (unless it is some nuts doomsday bunker that he didn’t make it to). Once all the necessary precautions are taken and the home is secured from outside intrusion then you can take a minute to relax. If possible sleep low on the ground as not to be spotted somehow from the outside, make sure to use no light source whatsoever. If you're near windows make sure if the power is still somehow working that nothing makes noises or draws attention to the possibility that the house is occupied. Now this little slice of heaven you've made for yourself could be a permanent stronghold for you or perhaps a stopping place for a few days. It all depends on the zombie activity in that area and also how readily available supplies are for you. Those decisions are up to you to decide as I ain’t there to hold your hand, but to give you advice on dos and don’ts of surviving. Man I am tired, as this savior of the people trip has got me ready for a good nap and some canned food. Man do I miss the luxury of ordering some pizza, or going to the store for some steaks, and man do I miss beer. Anyway it seems I need to eat some lunch so until next time remember to stay alive and don’t do anything stupid. Or if you want think "what would Brandon do?" if you want help to get you through the nights and days. Farewell everyone, now where is that damn can opener….. (Transmission signs off)