Hank McCoy (Before the Fur)

Weddings bring out the best in people.

Now, I’m not one to go blabbing personal business all over this site, but it’s POSSIBLE that this particular weekend happens to BE the wedding of a particular staff member at Omnicomic. I’m not going to name names.Of course, it’s mandatory that we do some kind of fitting tribute.

So, presented here? Some of the biggest weddings in superhero comic book history!

Lois Lane and Clark Kent (Kal-El of Krypton): The mother of all comic book couples, getting these two together took nearly sixty years or so of running storylines.

Old-school Superman fans tend to love the original dynamic between these two- which is always a matter of who, exactly, is saving who. Lois tends to treat Clark like he’s a lost, gullible puppy dog who wouldn’t know how to investigate himself out of a paper bag (which is not always entirely inaccurate). Clark, on the other hand, is mostly just playing dumb and pacing himself so as to be Clark Kent. Ultimately, Clark has to bail Lois out when she gets in over her head. But then again, Clark might never even have discovered important clue X or sinister plot Y if it wasn’t for Lois’ initiative.

Believe it or not- this was a pretty dynamic relationship given that it was originally introduced in the 1930’s. And what I have to give it credit for? Well, while a comic entitled Superman that mostly focuses on a guy running off to save a woman from imminent danger is bound to be criticized as sexist- the writers didn’t chose the most oblivious, air-headed companion for Superman to be saving over and over again, did they?

In fact, gender roles are a little reversed here- Lois is ambitious, aggressive and assertive. Clark is sensitive, emotional, and really interested in making his relationship with Lois work. Like I said, progressive for the 1930’s, right? I know some of what I’m talking about is how the relationship evolved over the years, but still, I think this stuff is tucked in there, even in the old stuff.

The relationship’s only gotten better, too- Lois and Clark are like the poster children for healthy, balanced relationships all over the world. Kind of in a perpetual state of newlywedness this last decade, they’ve actually started discussing the possibility of having a child.

Anyways their wedding was mostly populated with supporting Daily Planet characters; really drove home how human these characters are. Planet photographer and long-time Superman sidekick Jimmy Olsen was best man, Lois’ sister Lucy was the Maid of Honor and a lot of the additional attendants are actually penciled to look like DC comics’ staff members (nice touch).

On a sidenote- millionaire industrialist Bruce Wayne inexplicably attended and provided the couple with an upscale Metropolis apartment as a wedding present. (Extra sidenote- Batman even organized a wide variety of DC heroes to patrol Metropolis while Clark and Lois went on honeymoon).

Reed Richards and Susan Storm: Marvel’s first romantic couple, Reed and Sue started out kind of like something you’d see in a 1950’s science fiction movie: bright, sensitive young girl dates scholarly, older professor with a knack for exploring the unknown. The difference in age was a little creepy (after all, Sue was originally called The Invisible Girl) and the dialogue was pretty awful, but at the time, it worked.

Over the years, Sue and Reed’s relationship has evolved to be one of the most of lifelike and well-written pieces of the Marvel Universe. This is due partly to Susan coming into her own as a character. No longer content to allow her to be the F.F.’s damsel in distress, the writers gradually began to make it clear (no pun intended) that she was the emotional, moral compass of the team- the glue that held it all together- as well the most flat-out powerful of all four.

Of course, she does have a habit of doing too much for everyone else and not enough for herself. See, because she’s the invisible woman? She’s always taking care of everyone but is she really appreciated? The work that she does? Why doesn’t she just leave her sometimes-distant and socially aloof husband, anyway? Why not jump into bed with Namor, king of the seas? Do the two really have what it takes to make it work?

But that’s just it- they’re different. Sometimes really different. But when they meet each other half way, they balance each other. Reed can seem really out of touch, cold, even dorky- why would she ever be attracted to a guy like that (and don’t say because of the stretching)? But she sees something in him that’s passionate and that’s what does it for her. And of course, Reed should be grateful he has her- because Reed without Sue might not be such a pretty sight. Honestly, Reed really needs somebody around that IS emotional and insightful- because otherwise he’d probably just get consumed by his work.

And what would THAT look like? Probably not far off from one Victor Von Doom. I’ve said before- Reed and Doom have a lot in common. One of the biggest differences though? Susan. Over the years, Sue and Reed have survived a miscarriage, temptations to give in to infidelity, and well, just about every kind of intergalactic threat you can imagine. But they make it work- and partly because they know that it doesn’t really matter what everybody else thinks. They don’t care if other people think it’s a mismatch: they know it isn’t.

Sue and Reed’s wedding was, of course, filled to the brim with superheroes of all kinds. Various evil-doers did try to crash the place only to be foiled by the F.F.’s closest friends and families.

Oliver Queen and Dinah Lance: Fan-favorites, these two FINALLY tied a long overdue knot, recently.

Actually, Oliver had been looking to put a ring on Dinah’s finger for a long time but without success. Rejection never had anything to do with the quality of the relationship; Dinah had explained to her partner, time and again, that what they did for a living was too dangerous. Their was no place for a family in the work they did.

Actually, this relationship might go down in the books as "most likely to be well received by feminists" for superhero couples. I tread lightly here- after all, Black Canary’s revealing superhero attire, frequent motorcycle chases and "I like bad boys" persona is probably the source of one too many adolescent fantasies. But the thing I dig about them is this- there’s a little bit of competition between these two, yeah. They’re both risk takers, they’re both cool and know it, and they both know how to get under each other’s skin. But at the end of the day, Oliver really is WAY in love with Dinah. There have been some other women, sure- but he really is just infatuated with her.

BUT- he isn’t possessive of her. He’s wanted to marry her, sure, but there were plenty of times that he needed to accept an open relationship with her because that was as far as she was willing to take it with him. Simply put: Green Arrow doesn’t stop Black Canary from BEING Black Canary. He doesn’t tell her she can’t be great. So nothing about Oliver’s ego, I think, gets in the way of him really just wanting to be with her.

Dinah is pragmatic- but let’s face it, kind of a commitment-phobe. But then again, part of her backstory has to do with overcoming terrible shyness. Yes, lesser known point of fact- Dinah was actually very inhibited until she developed her superhero persona. So, basically, she’s had to work really hard on herself and isn’t dying to give that up for any guy who comes along. She LIKES being single- and really, that’s okay, isn’t it?

But, she DOES love Oliver and eventually concedes to marry him.

G.A. and B.C.’s marriage was kind of like the coolest high school couple you knew getting back together. The myriad complications of planning the wedding- invites, reservations, scheduling- along with a bunch of zany bachelor and bachelorette antics, was all very human. Of COURSE some supervillain (Deathstroke, who’s got a pretty heinous vendetta on Oliver these days) crashed the wedding, and Oliver and Dinah have had some bizarre turn of event since. But I think it’ll hold.

Peter Parker and Mary Jane Watson: If you’re deep in the Spider-man lore, you’ll already know this, but believe it or not, Stan Lee NEVER intended for Peter to end up with M.J.

And I don’t mean that in the terrible ‘Brand New Day, Stan Lee never intended for Peter to be with anyone’ sense either. There might always have been plans to kill off Gwen Stacey- but she was supposed to be the main event in the comic at the time when she was alive. M.J. was a walk-on distraction that was supposed to make the readers think ‘uh-oh, what if this girl gets between Peter and Gwen’?

But the thing was, the fans LIKED her. Liked her better than Gwen.

Why? Because she had a personality. She was sexy and assertive. Gwen was good-looking and kind…but something just didn’t jump off the page about her. Actually, some of the best stories about Gwen now kind of show her as having had this zen-like calm about how beautiful the world is, very accepting…and I can see that being a good fit for her character. Still, Miss ‘I am a stereotypically beautiful, perfect woman who never says anything offensive but also rarely say anything interesting’ didn’t exactly get the readers all riled up.

But there was something about M.J. that the readers dug. Originally, she was really supposed to be shallow, maybe even vain. But somehow she came out different. It was like she was in touch with her needs. And Peter, of course, wouldn’t know his frickin’ needs if they hit him in the face (which they do. Often literally.). Eventually, Gwen seemed shallow and M.J. just seemed like a normal, healthy woman who wasn’t afraid to take risks and go after what she wanted.

Peter was always taking care of Gwen (even if she didn’t know it). But God, he deserved some fun. He deserved the hot, cool girl next door that you could take home to Aunt May. Peter and M.J.’s relationship is, obviously, fraught with peril- but more of it has to do with intimacy issues Peter has than being Spider-man. I really kind of stick by having M.J. in the comic. I think there’s always some flashback or alternate continuity where Spider-man is young and single that you can work with- we all like that old version of him, sure.

But Spider-man is a comic about growing up. And nothing grows on you like working on a marriage (er…I would assume). Seeing Peter work through his isolation complex is really rewarding. And besides- they’re funny. The comic is funnier when they play off each other. Again, Peter and M.J.’s very ‘human’ wedding was staffed by Daily Bugle supporting cast members. Interesting note: M.J.’s illustrated dress was designed by a REAL wedding dress designer, Willi Smith.

Scott Summers and Jean Grey: I’m REALLY not big on this couple splitting up. I DO think that Scott and Jean’s relationship had had so many deaths and rebirths that it would traumatize any couple to a point where they’d want to go their own separate ways (and I DO like that scene where Jean’s spirit sees Scott and says "Live Scott…just live"). And the revelation that some part of Scott was, in fact, totally TERRIFIED that his wife could be in his head whenever she wished was an interesting twist.

Still, watching Scott and Jean break up was like having your close relatives get a divorce. It hurt.

Just want to point out though- NO SUPERVILLIANS busted up this wedding! There was also no pregame fight or honeymoon terrorist attack. In fact, their isn’t a single mutant fighting in this issue. Crazy, right!?

Ororo Munroe and T’Challa: I have grown to really love this relationship.

Partly because T’Challa drives her nuts, sometimes. Sure, Storm is emotional (as her name suggests) but how many times do you see Storm lose her cool? For some reason, T’Challa can get under her skin. He makes Storm itch a little. She’s got a thing for him and it’s hard for her to be vulnerable about it, on occasion. And T’Challa, of course, is totally unapologetic for how he’s the f'ing man.

So? Really? He kind of plays with Storm, a bit. Drives her a little crazy. But really, don’t you only pull the pigtails of the one you love? But really, these two are a perfect match for each other- and T’Challa has made his support for his wife (and, by extension, mutant kind) very clear. Not that Ororo needs a lot of hand-holding. After all, Storm was worshiped as a Goddess long before she was an X-man- filling the role of Wakandan queen isn’t too far out of her league. She’s always been an able leader but it’s cool to see her as a ruler, again.

I know what I’m talking about here is subtle, but if there’s one thing I love about this couple’s wedding it’s this- is it just me, or are the vast number of male X-men attending actually totally in love with Storm and have been nursing a crush on her for years and years? Wolverine? Nightcrawler? It just seems like there’s a little bit of subtext here; that Forge isn’t the only mutant having trouble letting her go.